What Sarah Says
Posted on January 18, 2008
Filed Under What Sarah Says | 1 Comment
Little kids are the pinnacle of creative thinking and originality. They have such an “outside the box” way of describing and reacting to things. They don’t have to “try” to be creative, they just are. Everything is brand new and fresh! So with this is mind, I thought it would be fun now and then to share some of my 3 year old’s perspectives on things. She is a never-ending source of amusement in our family, and besides, this is a good way to keep track of all her little “Sarah-isms”.
The first little Sarah-ism I want to share happened when we were getting ready to leave the parking lot after shopping recently. A couple of days before, Sarah had noticed cigarettes for the first time. My wife and I were quick to explain as best as we were able to a three year old, about the dangers of smoking. We were very proud about all the questions she asked.
Anyway, back to the parking lot. As we were getting ready to leave, a man with very dark skin walked past our car, smoking a cigarette. As he walked by, puffing away fiercely, Sarah stared. As soon as he’d gone by she said, “That man is smoking. Smoking is bad for your body!”
“That’s right Sarah!” We were thrilled that she had gotten our message.
But the next thing she said really took the wind out of our sails. “Yeah, smoking makes your body turn brown!” Of course this immediately led to trying to explain skin color, and it’s not a “bad” thing and so on……..Oops!
If you like this post, please consider buying me a cup of coffee.No-Tobacco Role Model
Posted on January 17, 2008
Filed Under Health, Role Modeling | Leave a Comment
When I wrote my post on New years day about quitting tobacco, I neglected to mention another good reason to quit: To be a role model for my kids. Perhaps this is the most important reason of all.
You never know when being a role model will pay off. Take my own situation. I mentioned that my Dad had quit when he was my age. What a great example of how being a role model works in real life! I am actually using him as my role model 30 years after he set the example. Pretty cool. Thanks Dad!
Being a role model for your kids isn’t just a here and now thing. It’s a lifetime statement that keeps repeating itself over the years into the next generation and beyond. My Dad’s statement is simple. You can do it too! Be healthy and live longer!
(I’m still at it. I’ve cut down by two thirds since New Years Day. I think the trick here is to quit gradually. I did this by just taking smaller chews, and at least twice a day replacing the urge to chew with a stick of chewing gum. I feel pretty happy so far with my results. In the next couple of weeks I’ll replace the regular chewing gum with nicotine gum.)
If you like this post, please consider buying me a cup of coffee.Ex-Bombs
Posted on January 15, 2008
Filed Under Communication, Ex Spouse Relationship | 1 Comment
I can’t think of any marriages that have ended on a sweet note when children are involved, although I am sure there are plenty of good examples out there. It’s best to realize early on that Problems will arise when Mom and Dad are not able to seperate personal from what really matters…. The children.
Good communication is not optional, but required, for the sake of the children. Good communication to me means being able to know exactly what items to discuss with your ex. Specifically I’ve made a little list of items that I call “Ex-Bombs”. They will explode in your face if not handled properly, either legally or emotionally.
- Anything that will effect how visitation is conducted. Be very clear about drop-off and pick-up times. Schedule weekend visitation changes well in advance and never be late or forget. Visitation also can include phone calls. It is a good idea to schedule a certain time and day to be considered as a regular call time, and even go so far as to have this be part of the visitation decree. A court ordered visitation schedule is considered a “default”. As long as everybody is getting along fine, you can be as flexible as you like.
- New Relationships: I’m talking about the significant others that you will be introducing your kids to. This is a touchy topic. Most dating ex spouses will wait too long to admit that they have a serious relationship blooming. It’s that whole privacy thing. If you are keeping the significant other away from your ex because he/she is jealous, that may not be reason enough. Rule of thumb: If he/she hears it from the kids first, that’s bad. If you find yourself telling the kids to not say anything, or to omit certain details, that’s even worse. Think about it.
- Moving. Address changes, phone number changes. These all fall under the category of common courtesy, and common sense. What if something happens to you? You have to let your ex know by law eventually. It’s that whole “eventually”, thing that causes friction. It’s best to let an ex know about address changes, etc., as soon as possible.
Packers Homefield Advantage
Posted on January 14, 2008
Filed Under Uncategorized | Leave a Comment
In two words or less decribe how you felt when Green Bay put a serious case of whop-butt on Seattle. Here’s my two words….Wa Hooo!!! I’m not sure if they count as a real words, but hey, who cares! I happen to like Seattle too. Beating them was sort of like beating up a kid brother. But, “It is, what it is”…….., and ”kid brother” has a black eye. Sorry Bro’! The Packers are another step closer to the Super Bowl and Brett Favre is another step closer to being a Superhero.
This post doesn’t have a whole lot to do with parenting or step parenting, but the Packers playing the Giants this Sunday at the “Ice Bowl”, aka Lambeau Field, illustrates my definition of homefield advantage in my post, “Three Categories of Step Parents”, perfectly. Homefield advantage or not, those poor guys are going to freeze their cahones off. It’s supposed to be at or below 0 degrees at game time.
I would also like to take this oppurtunity to personally thank Tony Romo for allowing the Packers this homefield advantage. Tony, if it hadn’t been for you losing your head in the last couple of minutes, and finally your eyesite as the ball was intercepted in the final seconds, we (Packers) would be playing you (Cowboys), at Dallas. Even so, we would have beaten you there, but I guess we will never know for sure….Sigh. Hee Hee!
The G-force (packer fans) are going to be out in force at Lambeau Field. I heard on the radio this morning that 50 yard line tickets are $3000 and stands are $700. No Way? Hint: Tail gating and a big screen are better in my opinion. At least you can sit in the lawn chairs and honey up to a heater. I’m a few miles from Green Bay if anybody wants to rent my big screen…..
Packers Vs. the Patriots at the Super Bowl?? Stats are saying that 74% people polled believe that this will be the final match up. What do you think?
If you like this post, please consider buying me a cup of coffee.The Three Categories of Step Parents
Posted on January 13, 2008
Filed Under Ex Spouse Relationship, Relationships | Leave a Comment
If you are a step parent, you most likely fall into one of the following three categories. Each type of step parent deals with problems unique to their role.
- Step Parent “A” is the spouse of the custodial parent. The family in which the child(ren) spend the majority of time with. This step parent has what I like to refer to as “Home-field Advantage“. This step has considerable power and influence over the rearing of the child, very often more so than the “non-custodial” parent.
- Step Parent “B” is the spouse of a 50/50 custody arrangement. The 50/50 step parent is becoming more common. This type of arrangement “levels” the playing field for step parents, yet can create it’s own problems, especially if the two households have poor communication.
- Step Parent “C” is the spouse of the “non-custodial” parent. This is the most dificult position of all. I refer to this step parent as the “Step-Below” step parent. This person exerts the least amount of influence and has potential for the greatest amount of pain.
What category do you fall under? Knowing your role may offer better perspective in viewing your own circumstances.
If you like this post, please consider buying me a cup of coffee. « go back — keep looking »
Loading ...-
About Me
I understand step parent issues. I've been a step parent, have a step parent, and I am married to a wonderful step parent.
Subscribe by clicking on the big orange button in the header, or by email below. Don't be shy about adding a comment, different perspectives build better understanding.
Search
Admin
Stepping Stones is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
blogarama.com
